[photo-3d] All's Quiet on the Western Front

["Gabriel Jacob" <gjacob@xxxxxxxxxxx>]

Hey, it's pretty quiet here today. Is it a holiday
or something? Nah, must be the weather, yeah,
that's it, the weather. This just in,...

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Turkeys will thaw in the morning, then warm in the
oven to an afternoon high near 190F.  The kitchen
will turn hot and humid, and if you bother the cook,
be ready for a severe squall or cold shoulder.
 
During the late afternoon and evening, the Cold
front of a knife will slice through the turkey,
causing an accumulation of one to two inches on
plates. Mashed potatoes will drift across one side
while cranberry sauce creates slippery spots on the
other.  Please pass the gravy.
 
A weight Watch and indigestion Warning have been
issued for the entire area, with increased
stuffiness around the beltline.  During the evening,
the turkey will diminish and taper off to leftovers,
dropping to a low of 34F in the refrigerator.
 
Looking ahead to Friday and Saturday, High pressure
to eat sandwiches will be established.  Flurries of
leftovers can be expected both days with a 50%
chance of scattered soup late in the day.  We
expect a warming trend where soup develops.  By
early next week, eating pressure will be low as
the only wish left will be the bone.
 
Author unknown.
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Gabriel known.